Last month we celebrated mothers with cards, flowers, candy, and breakfast in bed, but this month we celebrate dads whose roles in the families have changed in the past fifty years.
During the sixties and seventies, many moms were still “stay at home” moms who played the traditional role their mothers did while fathers took on all the financial responsibility for the family. My mom, along with we children, completed all the housecleaning, cooking, and laundry chores. My mom took us to our doctors appointments, went to our parent teacher meetings, made sure we did our homework, and sent us to bed each night at nine even though she ran my dad’s office as well. My dad came in from his 14 hour work day to a table with food prepared, an “Archie Bunker” chair where he reclined each night to control the remote, and then went to bed with fresh sheets and cleaned and pressed clothes to wear weekly.
When I married, I was a stay at home mom too, and my husband carried the financial burden for the family; it was still much easier for a family to live on one salary. My husband was more actively engaged in the household than my dad, but he never changed a diaper and he never took the kids to a doctor or dentist – he didn’t even know their names – yet he did cook and would help with some laundry. We were content.
Fast forward to the lives of fathers today. Most families have both parents work outside the home, and the traditional rules are out the window. My son and daughter-in-law share household duties because she works third shift as a nurse. He is responsible on the days/nights she works to cook dinner, bathe the girls, get them to bed, and then get them up in the morning for school or child care. My son-in-laws do much the same. One has conquered the art of making sourdough bread and perfecting the Pioneer Woman’s cinnamon rolls in between running kids around to sporting events. My other daughter confirmed her husband attempts to cook, folds laundry but not very well, helps clean when asked, but does a great job of making sure everyone is home safe and tucked in at night.
Another father I would like to recognize is my nephew. He is the father of a son with a disability. His son is dependent on round the clock care since birth, and my nephew has been there every step of the way. He is also actively involved in his daughter’s life and works full-time. At home he cooks and cleans, yet his son depends on him and his wife for all of his needs and my nephew never misses a beat. When his family visited me this winter, I was in awe of how well they have overcome every obstacle presented by their son’s unique disability. Being a father holds a lot of responsibility, and being the father of a child with disabilities is even a greater responsibility.
Once again, we at CORE know the responsibilities dads carry for their families. We are here to help bear some of that with you. Trust us to help guide your children with disabilities to find meaningful employment opportunities for more fulfilling lives.
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads, and extra hugs to our dads who have children with disabilities.
